Thursday, October 14, 2010

so you want to be in love like the movies?

Today I was driving home from work blasting The Avett Brothers, which is not an uncommon scenario. Per usual when listening to my favorite North Carolina alterna-folk-grassers, I thought " have a point, Avetts." [Tangent: Its safe to say Scott Avett is the finest example of the male gender that presently inhabits the earth, at least in this girl's humble opinion. Some may call it blasphemy, but I dig a guy with a somewhat Jesusy look about him. (subtangent: I am 98% certain that if Jesus was alive today and living in the greater Nashville area- I would try to put the swerve on him. An ambigulously ethnic carpenter with curls and a sweet beard...a friend to the animals and less fortunate...and just so happens to have some crazy ideas about society. SIGN ME UP! Plus, I bet he could get into any concert...because who has a more powerful dad?)]

 *see the resemblance is crazy, right?!?

I digress. I was listening to their live version of Love Like the Movies when this line hit my ear differently than it ever has before.

Now in the movies they make it look so perfect
And in the background they're always playing the right song
And in the ending there's always a resolution
But real life is more than just two hours long

SO TRUE. After being a girl for the last 27.84 years [Tangent: Wouldn't it be weird if I threw you a curve ball and said for the last 10 years?  Shamylan Twist!], Rom-Com love has finally worn me down. If Jennifer Lopez or Katheryn Heigl is at the helm, you know an onscreen love/hate relationship will dissolve into love after she sports a very cleavagey yet classy evening dress, and the object of their indifferent affection (usually Hugh Grant or Ryan Reynolds) sees her with fresh eyes. I have seen it all before- just not played in such a neat simple package for myself or anyone I know.

It's all very misleading [Tangent: DON'T GET ME WRONG...I love these films. Every time Never Been Kissed airs on TBS, I clear my afternoon to watch it.] In movies, it seems like a "smart move" to break up a wedding right before the rice is thrown (who cares about that rejected third party anyway?!?)  or go across the country to profess feelings to someone with whom "a moment" was shared. In real life both of these are terrible ideas. Instead of romantic, they are probably viewed more as desperate or insane....but that could be just my jaded perspective on love.

Again, DON'T GET ME WRONG, I possess rose-colored glasses, and have been known to slip them on occasionally. While watching a chick flick, its as I get enclosed in an idealistic bubble for 90 minutes or so [Aforementioned girly fortress of solitude is inevitably bright pink and smells like cotton candy]. Within the confines of this zone, ass hole moves like stopping traffic to get to a lover's taxi seem chivalrous.

As credits roll, I remember "Sweet lord! That wouldn't happen. That sucks." However, I always remember that grand ridiculous serenades and meetings at the top of the Empire State Building are good and all, but the little things, like remembering how someone takes their coffee would have been just as honorable a gesture. Practicality can be sexy.

There are days when I will cry at the end of You've Got Mail, but then other days, I think, "Wait, she's going to meet a stranger in New York City...What if NY152 murders Shopgirl in the middle of the park? No one in her inner circle (you know...the former coworkers at Shop Around the Corner) will know his true identity is Joe Fox. The case will go unsolved. Another Internet predator."

I wish there was a pill I could take to combat cynicism. If you know anyone at Phizer, tell them to get right on top of that.

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