being lisa loeb

Sometimes, not very often, I feel very lucky to be a mild hoarder because I find forgotten gems in everyday locations, like a basket in my bathroom linen closet. I give you my findings: my glasses from middle school. Try to restrain yourself gentlemen, especially if you like girls wearing very outdated Harry Potteresque frames.

I remember getting these and really feeling they were the cat's pjs. I also really liked yin yang baby tees...so go figure.

As I have mentioned before, my third string eye doctor has recently determined that I am getting blinder and blinder every day. Being that its the new year, that means its almost time for the most wonderful time of the year- tax season! [Tangent: I am being serious. I love tax season.  Because I am a no dependent single with no exorbitant expenses or morgages, I generally come out on top! Remind me of this minor victory next time I bitch about being single.] I am wishfully thinking that I may get a little chunk of cash back after ye olde government reimbursement that will allow me to buy my dream glasses, and be closer to reaching my goal of being Lisa Loeb! [Tangent: The Lisa Loeb I aspire to be is Lisa in the early 90's in all of her Reality Bites, angsty glory. I might be willing even to settle for Lisa Loeb, star of a short lived reality show about being perpetually single on the Oxygen station.]

Am I the only one that watched this? Highly likely.

Not unlike most octogenarians, glasses shopping is extremely exciting for me. Unlike Kimmie at age 8 [Tangent: Kimmie at age 8 made her mother write a note to her teacher reading "Dear Mrs. Pratt, Please make sure the kids don't tease Kimmie because she has new glasses and is very insecure about it."], Kimmie at age 28 LOVES her glasses.

Thanks to my friend, Justin, I have become obsessed with Warby Parker glasses, and am hell bent on getting some. They are vintage inspired yet under $100, and for each pair sold, they buy a pair for the homeless or people in Africa or something like that [Tangent: Clearly I have done my research. Either way its a good charitable deed. Both those groups would have their lives made better with vintage inspired eye wear. I mean, who wouldn't?] Since you can't try them on in person, you can do a virtual try on, which I had WAY too much fun doing.

Note the double glasses look. It's a good one.

My devotion to optometrical aids is very strong. I have even determined that if I get lasik one day, I will still put in clear lenses and wear them on occasions deemed glasses-worthy. Sometimes they just complete an outfit [Ex: If you wear a cardigan...you should wear glasses. That is a Biblical truth.] or do double-duty by concealing an unfortunate bout of acne. Trust though, that they will NOT be ridiculous dummy glasses like these terrible hipster kids are wearing. If I ever get to that point, make me reread this blog.

Note: The glasses on the right look strikingly similar to my 4th grade glasses, which coincidentally previously belonged to my older sister. Yeah...It's really no wonder my eyesight got terrible.