Friday, May 13, 2011

a smooth criminal


Its Friday, and I feel like a sack of vomit, [Tangent: Don't worry fair friends that know about my last illness. This is nothing. This is a like a bee sting. Just a teeny tiny wee little virus that has made me have the cough of a 40 year smoker and the voice of a pre-op transexual. Other than that- I am the bee's knees...I promise...no collapsed lungs...I'm good. OK?] so despite feeling the urge to breakout and do things, I am sitting around watching Criminal Minds off the DVR and picking the chewable Amoxicillin tablets out of my teeth that the doc perscribed this morning. [Spoiler Alert: They taste like moldy Pez....not as delicious as Ricolla honey-lemon cough drops or ol' school Dimetapp.]

Since I have moved back in with my favorite 60-year-old housemates (Mom and Dad), I have become very accustomed to the programming aimed at their demographic [Tangent: Because of this I actually am interested in the fact that Ashton Kutcher is going to replace Charlie Sheen on 2 1/2 Men because I will likely watch it at some point....my parents lap that show up.] because my episodes of US of Tara and Bored to Death are consistently being recorded over by marathons of NCIS or CSI: Whatever or Law & Order: Yadda Yadda or Bones or Criminal Minds. The latter of which, I actually kinda love and willingly watch marathon style.


Because I love this show, I allow myself not to nit-pick and dwell a couple key issues I have with it.

Issue 1: I really only like the Mandy Patinkin episodes, mostly because with Joe Montegna as the chief narrator, I only hear the voice of Fat Tony from The Simpsons. It's distracting mostly because I am crazy.

Ex 2: Although I love  Garcia as the wacky tech expert character, she also sometimes makes me go "hmmm...." Because my parents have barraged me with ensemble crime dramas, I find her strikingly similar to the gothy chick from NCIS.


Trust I don't let these two issues bother me too much, mostly I only have eyes for one gentleman on this show. No, not that sweet chocolately Shemar Moore or that Dharma and Greg fellow. No, I love me some Dr. Spencer Reid.

That's right- the nerdy fella with the penchant for cardigans old timey glasses and unpredictable hairstyles is basically the reason I started watching the series. [I can sense the judgement beginning.]



Other than being held captive by murderers and cult leaders played by two of my teen idols [Luke Perry and James Van Der Beek respectively.], Wikipedia describes him as socially awkward and possibly having Aspergers. Sure he's kinda skinny and weird and occasionally talks like a robot, but he's SMART!  I question this crush regularly, especially when I admit it to someone and they look at me puzzled and say, "Really, that guy?" But I could care less, he's so dreamy. [Tangent: Show of hands....how many of you think this tacky, ultra-photoshopped (and obviously produced by a 14-year old) should replace pictures of my dog, Newman, as my computer's wallpaper ?]

4 comments:

  1. I've been working my way through Dead Like Me on Netflix, and I recently realized that I'm going to be sad when the two seasons finish and I don't have any more Mandy Patinkin to watch. I guess now I know where to go next. Thanks!

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  2. Just a little comment....I LOVE RICOLLA HONEY-LEMON COUGH DROPS! (Just sayin...they're delicious) :)

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  3. While he is pretty, how can ANYONE turn down Shemar Moore? Ask Josh about our (very stupid) Criminal Minds theme song game.

    -ganto

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  4. [in the style of "Move that Bus"- a la Extreme Home Makeover-]: CHANGE THAT WALLPAPER!

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