Sunday, December 11, 2011

red red rampage

from my new favorite website : sketchy santas

Santa Rampage is a ridiculous parade of Santas down the streets of downtown Nashville, beginning at the Beer Seller/Cellar [Tangent: I have been there upwards of 10 times, and still cannot tell you which it is... and apparently I am too lazy to google. Both are's downstairs and it sells beer. Homophones with Southern accents confound me.] and leading to any bar that is not charging a cover and that offers free drink specials to those donning red caps. This is my third year rampaging and spreading cheer throughout the streets with other fools in St. Nick get ups, either homespun or store bought. [Tangent: BTW- I had no inkling how many naughty Mrs. Claus costumes were on the market. The variations were both upsetting and impressive. Thigh highs and well placed fur can have many incarnations.]

she looks cold.
Most bought a Santa a suit [Tangent: But once the $19.99 Party City suits sell out, it seems quite an investment to chalk up $50 for a once a year that may lead to questions when someone sees it hanging in your closet.] and others made their own out of things in their own home. This is the avenue I always take. Although, I can appreciate a very impresesive light up faux fur lined red luxury Santa Suit, I wanted to use my mermaid tail from Halloween again [Tangent: I really felt it deserved a large 300 drunken Santas. Aside from the confusion we got from some people, I got a lot of high fives and compliments, including one young drunken co-ed who professed her undying devotion to mermaids. "I love them...I have like mermaid quotes all over my bathroom." mermaid quotes?].

Each year, the ridiculous gets cranked up to 11.  This year there was a Santa brass band that followed us around and made me smile every time I heard it in the distance. Besides ballyhoo, the overwhelming theme is joy. Every Santa is the nicest person you will ever meet, and the camaraderie is ridiculous. High fives and shouts of "SANTAAAAAAAA!" are not at all uncommon. Basically, this is how Christmas should be. Slutty reindeer and Asian Santas in rice picker hats - this is what all those carols are singin' about.

1 comment:

  1. Clearly I did not experience true Joy this Christmas. Or on any Christmas before that. Noted.


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