|Because I didn't eat one....I had to find one online. best. google. find. ever.|
So...I know I have been gone for a while but I have had some time sucks on my life that have happily distracted me a little bit from blogging, but fear not, I am back and with a vengeance. Today is the last day of Moustache May so that time suck will recede, and hopefully, I will have more time for my first priority, writing and entertaining you fine people. [Tangent: Judge away for my participation with friends on a website that celebrates month long ironic facial hair...you will never understand the awesome. Need proof?]
Besides participating in the above ballyhoo this fine Memorial Day weekend with some of my favorite 'stached enthusiasts, I also did something I have always wanted to do, but never done. I went to a Renaissance Festival. [Tangent: I am not what you can a larper/Ren fest kinda gal. It is in no way my scene...but I love festivals, people watching and food tents- so it seemed like the mother ship was honing me in.] I am not sure if it lived up to my lofty expectations, especially considering the "Sorry, We're Out of Turkey Legs" signs that were hung on every food tent, but I did learn some valuable lessons that I would like to share:
Lessons learned at The Tennessee Renaissance Festival:
- Fried Oreos are like crack and magic kinda awesome. As a chunked out middle schooler, I am sure I dreamed of a funnel cake/oreo hybrid...and now, as a thinner adult, I know this mystical thing to be a reality.
- Its completely appropriate for you to tart up your child in fishnets and high boots with the caveat that you are "in character"
- Ren fest enthusiasts are not AT ALL body conscious. There were multiple points in the day where I had to double take a woman in a midriff top, wondering if they had given birth to triplets hours earlier. Usually her stretched out Tweety Tattoo was an indicator.
- Pirates and Klingons apparently had some part of the medieval lifestyle...at least according to the costumes I saw roving around in the woods [Tangent: It seems some just hit the Party City day after Halloween sale and chose to get the most out of their clearance purchase.]
- Nothing can beat an adult male in a full Link costume.
- Camel rides were available, which leads me to believe Jerusalem was annexed into the European Rennaissance period.
- It detracts a bit from a period costume when the wearer has a yard beer in their right hand and a pack of Basic ultras in their left.
I will leave you with one last mythological present: