Wednesday, January 25, 2012

the handicapped stall revisited

I love getting text and/or FB messages from my friend, Turin, because they are generally out of total left field and laced with brilliance. A couple nights, out of the blue, he sent me the following picture and message [Tangent: In fact, I'll wager many of the texts featured in this post were from his cellular phone] :
Can this be added to your  "get the f#*k out of my stall" post???

I know you are questioning why this is laced with brilliance, but it is something that I have stated before in this blog: When people poop in public- they nearly ALWAYS opt for the handicapped stall. The sociological question remained: WHY!?!?! I feel like its something that deserves delving into again. [Tangent: The issue not the doodie, itself. Stop being gross, readers.]

What ensued was a ridiculous discussion between me and my good friend, Turin. He had always seen this "pooping in the handicapped stall" as something people did from a place of insensitivity, but this meme changed his perspective:
"I figured it out- people use the handicap stall for comfort, its the cadillac of toilets... all this time i felt it came from selfish hating ways...I'll be damned. it's about status of using the thrown room. I didn't realize til this hit me in the face."
I, myself, had not seen it through that exact set of eyes before. Really? A status symbol? My silly mind assumed people just delegated the big stall as the crapper in a thoughtless (albeit not malicious) effort to get more airspace to get one's poop on. [Tangent: Because...lets be honest- you non handicappeds rarely opt to use that stall unless you are gonna be there for a while. And don't say this isn't "a thing" that happens in offices and shopping malls everyday. A google image search tells me otherwise: ]

Turin made me realize that we wheeled ones are slightly elitist. I mean we do get the choice parking and what he referred to as the Cadillac of toilets. Why wouldn't people want the exclusive treat of pooping first class after a hard day at work? There's so much leg room! Since "public pooping" is not an everyday event- maybe it should be the VIP room to use. 

I understand slightly more now, and theoretically I should feel feel slightly honored, but I don't. When you go in there to stink bomb, I know you are trying to offend the lowest common denominator...but because denominator is moi- I have to take issue [Tangent: Because I am the one that has to McGuyver my summer scarf into a gas mask so not to make it the "vomit stall."]. Although now slightly more compassionate- I still am very opposed to this epidemic.


  1. Vomit stall..hahaha. HERO! -Turin

  2. i like the handicapped stall because usually the door crack isn't placed so that someone standing outside can see you sitting on the toilet. and because it is so roomy. haha.

  3. Squashing into the public stall with a 5 year old, a 4 year old and a 2 year old in tow is kinda bonkers. If I promise to be quick, will you forgive me? And who are these weirdos pooping in public, anyway ?!?!


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