Tuesday, July 17, 2012

ya got a nice white dress and a party on your confirmation...

If I am at a wedding or a karaoke establishment, the surest way to get me from normal to crazy in 10 seconds is to pump some Billy Joel from the speakers...most specifically "Only the Good Die Young." It speaks to me as a semi-Catholic girl. [Tangent: Its kinda like how women with brown eyes lose their shit when Van Morrison is played.]
obligatory first communion picture
Full disclosure. I used to be a really good fish on Fridays/church on Sundays kind of Catholic....granted I was a pre-adolescent at that point in time, so there weren't a lot of opportunities to break Biblical law and I was yet to come to any spiritual crossroads [Tangent: Although I was super tempted when they took Salute Your Shorts off the air.]. At that point in time it was all underage wine consumption and making cotton ball sheep in CCD class. Because I haven't been much of a church goer in the since I was a teenager, I for some reason just forget how much of  a super Catholic I used to be.  [Tangent: ya know...not a half assed Catholic like I was in high school or a Catholic ultra lite like I've considered myself since college....ya know trying to live a good life without condoning child diddling or hatred of gays etc. Some of my favorite people have been sodomites, after all...so bump that. ]

Thankfully- last nigt my dear sweet Catholic school grad of a mom, who has a tendency to hoard like I do, was cleaning out her closet and found a bunch of stuff she had saved from when she taught first grade Sunday school when I was younger. She had saved some of my sunday school projects as well and when she showed them to me they cracked me up.  I felt the need to share what young naive Kimmie was like. 
This was some kind of grim puzzle we completed and glued in the scroll. I thought it was a little blunt for 6 year olds. Coudln't they have made the crucifixion seem slightly less brutal? Guess not. Religions dark.

This says "Draw a picture of something you wonder a lot about" and that's right I drew a puppy. I am a deep thinker.

see...my penchant for gingers and brightly colored clothes started young. [Tangent: Imagining Jesus as a ginger with a pageboy haircut really shakes up the gospels.]

My mom told me I must not have had a good grasp on the assignment.

As a rule, red paint should not be used for handprints...unless you want it to look like a murder scene.


  1. Kimmie, you have always had a way with words! I am sorry that I am now just finding out you blog! It is so nice to hear those Kimmie tangents again! Happy we've reconnected online! You were always such a sweet friend!

  2. Killing me with this. I don't even understand that color assignment. No wonder you didn't as a kid. I was a Southern Baptist and they put a similar lean on their craft projects. I'll never forget thinking about how it must have been to have nails hammered through the palms of my hands as a little bitty kid.

  3. First of all, thank God mom cleaned out her closet (would that be considered using the Lord's name in vain? I remembered to capitalize it. I'm gonna go with no; so still a good Catholic!). Secondly, I hope you did not end up keeping all that old CCD crap that she removed. Next, everybody knows that fear is not pink, it's aquamarine. Finally, maybe the red finger paint used for the handprints is meant to symbolize Jesus's holes in his hands after the crucifiction. Like you said, "religion is dark." Also-I thought your puppy was a bird

  4. hahaha, what color were those feelings supposed to be? red for blood? i remember doing a play, and it was about the olympics, and jesus, somehow. I had a solo in the part linking the colors in the olympics to jesus and i still remember it "and through his blood so red, that willingly he shed, that stain became white again!" haha, what the heck

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