Monday, October 15, 2012

one man's junk

So now I am home from my vacation to the beach, so be forewarned that the next few posts are likely going to be beachcentric. You'll deal with it. I promise.

While driving to the NC beach, we got slightly turned around. My dad insisted on ignoring SIRI and her navigational instructions, and instead go by his internal GPS and love of "shortcuts", even though he had not visited Holden Beach in about 10 years. He is nothing if not incredibly stubborn. At the time, I was slightly irritated by his inability to trust technology, but because of it....we happened upon something completely ridiculous/incredible. 


Out of the side window of our SUV while driving through Varnamtown, NC, I spotted something that was either a roadside attraction, evidence of a hoarder gone berserk or a possible murder scene. Because my father drives down country roads like a 1930s moonshiner, I couldn't distinguish which, but Jamie and I mentally noted that we would like to return and investigate this "place" we passed at some juncture in our week long vacation. 

Because we were slightly lost and had no idea what we were looking for, other than it was something involving vintage cars, pirates and discarded toilets...we couldn't find it on our first couple excursions. We googled every possible search term and there were no pictures or information in existence on any corner of the Internet. It was almost like one of those horror movies, where a person stays in a hotel or sees a person and then later, after searching the microfiche at their local library, finds out that it burned down hundreds of years ago. [Tangent: That is the concept of The Shining, right? I don't know, I am finally gonna stop lying to people and actually watch the whole thing this hallo-season.]

Thankfully, we finally dragged my brother along on one of our journeys because he too had seen this apparition when venturing into Varnamtown to buy fish. The three of us were apparently the only people that knew about it, or perhaps the only ones that had survived. Not certain. We finally found out that it was called simply "Dale's" and that it was a junkyard (? maybe ?). Because 90% of it was fenced off and guarded by creepy roosters [Tangent: Seriously...that is the eeriest guard animal imaginable.], and the front door to the establishment was locked...the only service it was providing was a coke machine out front. 

We could only access the front half of the premises, but fear not- I took LOTS of phone photos so that the Internet would have at least one reference for other travellers who happen upon Dale's Junkyard in Varnamtown, NC. IT EXISTS! Here's proof. 
this was the main attraction. If you have never seen a tour bus with a crack rock, skeleton and rolled up dollar bills affixed to the top - clearly you need to come to Varnamtown.

the last line made me giggle
there were a bunch of odd cars driven by mannequins

like this lady

my brother modeling
my favorite random old car. 

 more rolled up dollar bills and junkie allusions...so bizarre

I want this on a sampler...post haste

more creepy old vehicles

obligatory southern pride hanging scene for no apparent reason

unmanned zoltar machine.
just your everyday dummy funeral with a "in the heat of the night" era NC patrolman nearby

one of several toilet arrangements

this was one of the more creative ones.

it really just keeps getting more and more disturbing

one of the many older and less ridiculous cars
 So now if you are driving along the roads of Coastal North Carolina and are itching to see an homage to all things junky and/or creepy and/or potentially offensive- Dale's is for you!

10 comments:

  1. definitely my kind of place! so strang. i think the kotex car is my favorite, only because the s.w.a.t. this is so so disturbing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Texas Chainsaw Massacre.... obviously you've been neglecting to watch that one through, as well. If you ever had, you wouldn't have stayed long at that place ;) CREEPY! There's a random old shack off 59 here in Texas that has a huge multicolored flame sculpture coming out of it's side. It looks like a house fire on an acid trip. Right there in the middle of nowhere, blink and you'd miss it. The randomness of folks keeps life interesting :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Actually, it is my favorite Horror Movies. Apparently, I was looking to get murdered.

      Delete
  3. Wow!! That's my kind of place! You're so lucky to have stumbled upon it. And man, wouldn't you LOVE to meet this Dale guy. I'm trying to imagine driving that Kotex car around town.

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