I love Target. I practically live there and if I ever need to kill an afternoon...that's my destination. There's always a deliberate pattern in my shopping as I snake around the store starting with the dollar aisle and ending usually in the makeup aisle [Tangent: Unless I make a last ditch sojourn to the little girls department where I can sometimes squeeze my 30 year old body into a girls size 16. Don't judge.] Whenever they do an in store redesign....it really throws off my chi; that is, unless they are adding a new product line and in that case I am all over it.
For this reason, I was super excited when I wandered through Target one day and stumbled upon the Neiman Marcus for Target line, which featured big name designers that I could never afford...at a lower price...that I still coudn't afford. [Tangent: Yep...that was the kicker. Sadly even when mass marketed at Target, I would still never pay for $50 for a yoga mat, even if it is Diane Von Furstenburg. Also, what the hell would I need a yoga mat for?] It made me sad because some of the stuff was really pretty....but I knew I was clearly meant more for Xhileration brand, and less for Brian Atwood [Tangent: "He's like a really important designer."]. This was just the universe's way of putting me in my place...or so I thought until I got a text from my fellow bargain hunter and target enthusiast, Laura.
Immediately, I was stoked and then downtrodden because although this was great news...I am still gainfully unemployed and milking my severance for all that its worth until I find a job that I can at least tolerate or that tolerates me...whichever comes first. Was a fancy lace dress something I needed in my life? [Tangent: Especially when I have worn nothing but leggings and sweatpants for the last month.]
Then like angels from the heavens, my birthday gift cards beckoned to me from my wallet and I remembered I had $55 dollars in Target bucks! Now I could afford the frivolous impulse purchases that I desired aka a $29 Robert Rodriguez hot ass dress. In order to make the $50 cap and make free shipping- I also bought Jamie a super sassy old man sweater by Rag + Bone. [Tangent: I love a man in a cardigan nearly as much as I love myself in a cardigan...and we know thats A LOT.] This meant for all these designer duds I spent the grand total of 70 cents. This may be one of my proudest days as a savvy shopper. [Tangent: Although after I bought it I read the reviews, which I really should have read prior because allegedly the dress has a bunk zipper. Oh well. My mom's a sewer, so suck it Merona! I'm fancy now.]
Get it while it's here because don't you need a Marc Jacobs scarf or a Rodarte Christmas ornament in your life? We can all get matching $29 designer dresses and start a girl group. What do ya say?