Monday, June 10, 2013

I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 30, too. aka Mr. Zuckerburg- butt out!

So today is June 10th and thus is the birthday of my best friend, Kristen. We have been best friends since middle school and I have always been 6 months older. This was all fun and games when I was turning 18 or 21 and could rub it in her face that I could see R rated moves and/or could legally purchase my Bacardi Silvers or Skye Blues, [Tangent: Clearly that shows my age, because those haven't been on the shelves in forever] but now it just means I beat her to to being old. Not. As. Fun.

us at my 16th birthday, when being the older one was waaaaay more fun.
 She's in an awesome place in her life....back in school pursuing a career she loves and married with a babe in the belly, so obviously I want to celebrate it. We did the ice cream cake and celebrating last Saturday,[Tangent: I can't say drunken ballyhoo because, as stated, she is harvesting a human being.] so now I am left with leaving her the obligatory "happy birthday" on Facebook. [Tangent: There are many times, like election season, where having a FB profile is a royal pain in the arse, but there are other times, like birthdays, where social media can magically give you an ego boost. Never are you so popular, as when it's your birthday on Facebook. I highly recommend it to everyone.]

When I went to go try to leave her some clever incarnation of "Happy birthday, Kristen," I noticed the lovely Facebook geniuses have made it where you can send a gift to your friends. Previously, I had noted how it would recommend a Target or a Starbucks gift card to me when I was leaving a birthday greeting for that girl that sat 2 seats behind me in high school Spanish or that one guy I met at a house party 7 years ago, but never have I looked at the other options. Because it's my best friend in the whole wide world, I thought, "What the hell? Let's see whatcha got Mr. Zuckerberg!"

Well these things, which are 100% real, are what Facebook thinks my newly 30 BFF needs in her life. [Tangent: I guess all 30-year-olds shop exclusively at Spencer's Gifts.]

I wish I saw someone using these. I would die.



again. if someone bought me this...i'd be upset.


do people still use shower caps?


hamburger change purse probably means something else on urban dictionary...just sayin'

So, I guess what I'm saying, Kristen, is are you in need of some handerpants or does baby Davis crave a 5 lb gummy bear? Here's to many more birthdays together! This is what we have to look forward to.

9 comments:

  1. I VOTE FOR THE AQUA NOTE! I love how the FB gift suggestions are like weirder versions of the SkyMile catalog or whatever it's called. Happy birthday to your slightly younger BFF! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know! I loved how there was nothing at all redeemable. I mean I love a novelty more than most people, but no one needs a duck shower cap!

      Delete
  2. I'm actually quite impressed with mr. zuckerberg's algortihm. Given your personality, he knew you'd LOVE something like that, re-blog about it and now I want a pair of handerpants. YOU WIN AGAIN ZUCKY

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am still mystified by handerpants? What is their utility!??!?

      Delete
  3. i use a shower cap sometimes! if i want to take a shower but don't feel like drying my hair. i think i need a cute one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. well then I will buy you a duck one...and those aqua notes so you can make shopping lists while wearing it. :)

      Delete
  4. Please, can I have some handerpants for my 30th?! I think they're quite appropriate!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I ordered you the 5 lb gummy already :(

      Delete

I thrive on comments, so what do you think?

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...