Tuesday, October 29, 2013

"bangable" Milhouse aka why I love the internet

Are you ready to hear perhaps the greatest Halloween costume tale ever? God, I hope so, because here it comes.

Back story, my friend Ryan, who I met a few years ago through my pub trivia team, has a love of all things pop culture and takes Halloween more seriously than some take religious rites. [Tangent: ...which is exactly why we are friends. How could we not get along? You may also remember Ryan as the guy that bought me the Full House board game at Goodwill. He's good people.] Here are some of his previous costumes. From Marty McFly to Jason Lee's character in Mallrats to Seymour Krelborn from Little Shop of Horrors, they are all spot on! People are on pins and needles as to what he is gonna be every year. However, the one that got the most kudos was his turn last year as Milhouse Van Houten from The Simpsons. [Tangent: Painting yourself head to toe mustard yellow and dying hair and brows cobalt blue will do that.]


Apparently his friends weren't the only ones that thought it was amazing, because last week, while at the beach, I got the following text from Ryan [Tangent: One which made me snort saltwater and immediately show it to everyone in my family that was there. ]



[Tangent: I should go ahead and file a disclaimer, my friend Ryan is NOT gay. He likes the ladies. And he is currently single, so if you are an attractive nerdy gal who is into guys who respect the sanctity of Halloween, let me know...I'll set you up! Though when a gay-centric tumblr called "Tumblin with Hotties" selects you as the flavor of the day, you of course are rightfully flattered. ]

Within moments of sucking in the knowledge that my friend was being featured on a site that is decidedly NOT SAFE FOR WORK [Tangent: As evidenced that there were naughty gifs and many many naked pelvises plastering my laptop a few minutes ago.], my curious self was naturally clicking the link he sent to see in what context he was used. It was better than I could have imagined. The caption was very succinct, yet hilarious.

kinda gives MILF a new meaning

Yeah...this pretty much sums up exactly why I love the internet. How am I still shocked by the things it presents to me? No I am not shocked that Tumblin' with Hotties exists, but I am a little surprised that amid its many many many shots of naked dudes in leather chaps and or men in quite compromising scenarios, it included this photo of my friend painted yellow clutching a Krusty the Clown doll.

Is this a fetish I am not aware of? Simpsons erotica? And if so, is Milhouse like the holy grail of characters you would wanna bang? If not, is there a ancillary character you find gets your motor running more? Please, I really need feedback on this. [Tangent: I mean I love redheads with accents and facial hair, but Groundkeeper Willy doesn't do it for me. Sorry pervs. ]

ok...but maybe he should. He's kinda ripped!
What cartoon would you like to get to know in the Biblical sense?

15 comments:

  1. This is possibly the greatest thing ever!

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    1. I seriously laughed so hard and immediately told him, "you know I'm blogging about this, right?"

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  3. um, i think this is the best post in the history of the internets. also - that costume RULES.

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    1. I mean it doesn't have a cat in it, but its pretty close to breaking the internet! I seriously laughed so hard, especially considering "fuckable milhouse" has gotten like 600 reblogs. My friend is a gay icon!

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    2. I think the 600 is from the original post that I put up on "Fuck Yeah, Springfield!"

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  4. I can't stop laughing...long enough...to type more...

    Alicia

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    1. I knew you might appreciate this! I always wonder where my picture ends up. I can only imagine there are fetish sites out there going crazy with your site!

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  5. OH MY GOSH! hahahah! But srsly, his Milhouse costume is EPIC.

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    1. I should have posted his Ferris Bueller costume from this year. SO GOOD!

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  6. for some reason Winnie the Pooh popped into my head! And NO, I can't even fathom the slightest sexual attraction to a large stuffed bear but I suppose there are those who do!

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    1. There's a peg for every hole! I'm wishing you weren't anonymous!!

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  7. oh my gosh you know i was SHRIEKING when ryan texted me that. oh my god i can't believe he was on that tumblr. not because his milhouse wasn't cute, but because it is NOTHING like the rest of that tumblr! hahahaha i will probably be laughing about it for years!!!

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    1. I had everyone in my family cracking up and looking at tumblin with hotties on my phone. Having a gay site call you hot is the highest compliment! Ryan's life should be forever changed for the better

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