Wednesday, July 23, 2014

my crazy obsession: 2 year old edition

Preamble: I know I have been a spotty poster, and this month, the majority of my posts have been guest posts [Tangent: Seriously thanks to Kristen and Sarah for being eloquent and classy only for me to go and reverse it with my shallow spiels.] . This inconsistency is a deadly mixture of being lazy and busy ....we'll call it "bazy," but life is simmering and getting dramatically more status quo boring, so it's back to hearing about that my ridiculous affairs. Yay for you!

So you know I watch a lot of crap TV, right? [Tangent: A friend of mine recently was appalled that I shrug off Game of Thrones in favor of fare like Little Women: LA. (I've shamelessly watched every episode.) I mean I love Peter Dinklage, but I guess I prefer my little people on the small screen to be catfighting instead of dragon slaying. Sorry.] So one show I love without shame is TLC's crazy train of programming My Crazy Obsession. [Tangent: Which is pretty much interchangable with My Strange Addiction on TLC.] There is one episode where they profile a couple head over butt crazy obsessed with Cabbage Patch Kids. They treat take them out in public and treat them like an actual child.

The above was pretty much my week last week...only the adorer of said child of the patch was not an unhinged 50 something, but rather my super cute two and a half year old niece. Because of this, her neurotic obsession was adorable and not bone-chilling. Long story short, once my sweet niece, Ellie, found the doll in my closet, they became inseparable besties. [Tangent: In the top of my closet, I keep some relics of my original Cabbage Patch tin Sesame Street lunchbox from preschool (that probably would be worth something had I not emblazoned my name all over Grover's face to keep some other rugrat from stealing it during nap time) and other things that I refuse to part ways with.] Here is photographic proof of their love affair!

the doll's FUPA is out of control.

she read her stories every night

she did this all by herself. I can't comment on my doll's level of diaper wedge, but Jamie calls this look "shit suspenders" my niece wasn't quite understanding that you aren't supposed to sit on historic civil war soldier's headstones. Her sense of history has not yet kicked in. Don't worry, we told her to get off after we snapped this picture.
This morning, my niece went back to Cali and left the object of her week-long obsession behind. It's probably for the best...we don't want this to spiral out of control. It won't be as gosh-darn adorable when she is 50.

Who am I kidding? I am currently looking for a replacement to send her in the mail to fill that cabbage patch sized void in her life. However, it won't be with these things...they are horrifying... Am I a total dick for not just giving her mine? Probably...


  1. next time she is on this coast you have to take her to babyland general hospital! and take me! i'm dying to go but Travis is not interested AT ALL. i can just imagine how freaky it is!

  2. I will go!!!!


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