Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Back to Basics...and Perusing Oriental Trading

Have you ever been run down and creatively completely drained. That is me. Human wasteland- Population: 1. I have been working consistently on pulling out of my butt design and writing projects and I was getting kinda in a place where all I wanted to do lately was sit around and watch The Voice and not interact with humans or really do anything productive whatsoever. Promised blogs were piling up and mustering that energy was hard. I was spent.

Then on Sunday, I spent the afternoon with some of my favorite lady bloggers [Tangent: Among them are the brilliant minds behind Lladybird, Old Red Boots, The Fiercest Lilliputian, My Pretty Baby Cried She was a Bird, Kittycat Stevens and Junebugs and Georgia Peaches.] and I felt the need to kick my ass in hyperdrive and was reminded how much joy I find in blogging. 

In order to make it easy on me, I thought I would get back to basics and blog about something that brings me great joy: awkward modeling in Oriental Trading Catalogs. [Tangent: OK. Pause. Rewind. About 15 years ago, I ordered a gross of some random doohickey for an event and so every since I get Oriental Trading monthly barraging me with catalogs and bi-weekly via email. A sane individual would hastily unsubscribe, but even though I never order anything, I look forward to the junk mail. (I mean who needs a dozen inflatable microphones or a gross of Christian pumpkin temporary tattoos?) They are so inadvertently funny. When I worked at the insurance company, I would bring these in from time to time and my work friends and I would add appropriate (or inappropriate) subtitles on our break. Yeah, I know...but when your job is SUPER boring, the stupidest things are wildly entertaining.]

I often wonder about child models and wonder if they will one day have a sense of humor about the ridiculous things they showcased in print. [Tangent: I for example as an adult, I now find it weird that I modeled with a bottle of lotion and a box of tissues as a preteen.] Oriental trading is rich fodder for this kind of strange prop modeling. Will the little boy above wonder as an adult what on earth he is dressed as... Hawaiian pimp? Steve Harvey at a luau? Help me out. What is he?

Given that Halloween is approaching quick, I thought I would offer you a few options for half-assed flimsy costumes that can carry you through the winter of the child modeling team at Oriental Trading. I know most of them are Christmassy, but they terrify me to the core [Tangent: Yay for versatility.] You're welcome in advance.


I missed the charming holiday tale that this was a part of. dear sweet god.
these in no way even look like mustaches.
The term "disguise" is used super loosely, right?  Perhaps it should be in quotes...and not "beak."

Sorry if only like 2% of you found this amusing...but that 2%- you are my people. What do you think these chidren will think of their modelling debuts as adults?

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