You see, with the exception of James Bond movies and really anything featuring Vin Diesel, I pride myself on being pretty pop culture savvy, but the truth is I have not seen 99% of classic Christmas films. [Tangent: It seems a bit unbalanced that I hadn't seen It's A Wonderful Life until 2 years ago, but if asked, I could reenact verbatim the fashion show scene in Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead. It's also worth mentioning that I was terrified of Claymation Christmas specials till I was almost 30, so that very well played a hand in it. ] With the exception of Elf, Home Alone and A Christmas Story, I hadn't seen many till the last couple years when I finally checked off National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (I am prepared for that backlash) and Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer. [Tangent: Maybe I am just trying to add adult subtext, but I still can't completely compute whether BergerMeister MeisterBurger was a Nazi or if his weird walk was just a stop motion thing.]
To be fair, most of these movies are such a part of life that I know all about them without ever sitting through them. For example, I knew everything I needed to know about It's a Wonderful Life from the episode of Beverly Hills 90210 where the gang was visited by an angel named Clarence. [Tangent: I just googled it, and learned that the episode in question was called "It's a Totally Happening Life." Lord, I miss the 90s so damn much sometimes.] When people talk about these movies in casual conversation, I generally just use context clues to pretend I know what I am talking about. I don't.
Here are some that I checked off the list this year and what I thought as someone who was watching beloved classics for the very first time.
Sisters song has been earwormed into my mind since I saw it, so much so that I secretly wish I had a conjoined twin so we could have a vaudeville act where we perform it. [Tangent: Not sure why the conjoined element is necessary, but I think that is the twist the act is lacking. Maybe I need to ween myself off AHS: Freak Show.]
A Charlie Brown Christmas
this kid...and I was some Pig Pen/Lucy hybrid. The truth stings.
A Muppet Christmas Carol
Even though I watched this days ago, I still am not sure how I feel about it. So many of my friends are obsessed with this movie and quote it all the time, and I was just meh about it. I did love the little boy though. Maybe it was the fact that they made my beloved Lauren Graham into a harlot. I just can't handle that. Loralei/Sarah Braverman ain't no ho!
Well, that's it...that's my holiday secret that I am trying to rectify.
What did you watch over the holidays?
What movies are you ashamed that you have never seen?