Monday, December 28, 2015

Most Baffling Christmas Comercials 2015

The holiday season is taking it's dying breaths and I am finally coming to grips with what a terrible blogger I have been as of late [Tangent: Sorry I have been living life, ya'll! It happens. I only even watched half of one documentary in December. My "slacker" card is clearly in the mail.] Every year, I have taken some aspect of Christmas culture that I find a bit baffling, and this year- I have been completely neglectful in discussing with you 2015's BIGGIE. [Tangent: Last year I talked about the wonderfully tacky inflatables and another year I wrote about my mild fear of claymation christmas specials.] This year, I was inspired by those I watch TV with to write about something that definitely falls within this ad major's wheelhouse: Holiday commercials. [Tangent: Also...I realize I am like two weeks too late on this topic, but I have been too busy coloring in my adult coloring book because ya'll...it's 2015 and that's what one does in lieu of being productive!]

Some ads become tradition. Ex: Those damn Hershey Kiss hand bells that have been ringing since the mid 80s. Others we count down the minutes until December 25th so they can be forever swiped from our memory bank. There were two this past Christmas season which didn't disturb me so much, but bothered those around me so much that their ire started to wear off on my own psyche...and suddenly I was taking notice of how bizarre and cringe-inducing they were each time they aired..which seemed like it was every 5 minutes.

The first one is a Kroger ad, [Tangent: but after researching is an ad that has been used with several different grocery chains, because to be honest it's pretty generic so could work for any myriad of things. Hell...this ad could be for Glade or Pottery Barn...no one would be the wiser.]  The ad, which you can watch here, features a guy in a wheelchair hosting a very diverse holiday dinner gathering where for some inexplicable reason...everyone there uses the word "wonderful" whether it seems natural/appropriate or not. [Tangent: If this party were happening in Pee Wee's Playhouse and "wonderful" was the word of the day, I'm fairly certain Jambi and Chairy and  the whole gang would be hoarse from losing their damn minds every 2 seconds.] This commercial never really jumped out at me until Jamie pointed out to me the moment that happens around the :18 mark. A sweet older lady looks down at her ham and just kind of creepily whispers "Wondeful..."
I am not entirely sure why we found this moment so funny and weird, but every single time the commercial aired [Tangent:...which as stated earlier was on every commercial break from November-December 25th because Kroger really wanted to get the most out of this campaign.] This led to daily impressions of this woman while staring at our meals. She was wore or less a meme...at least to us. 

The second ad was for another retailer which seemed an odd match for the campaign and seemed to baffle those around me.  Both my mother and my friend-tendant, Kate, expressed mild rage over the ladies in this Big Lots ad.


Maybe it's because that jingle is a little grating or maybe their rage is because it doesn't really seem on-brand for Big Lots. When I think of Big Lots I think of many things, but glamour and sparkly backup dancers are not chief among them. [Tangent: I think more of weird industrial lighting, discontinued makeup and children without shoes on. I say this in the most un-condescending way possible, because to be fair I have spent my fair share of time inside a Big Lots.] I know...I know...irony and whatnot of glamourizing the big box store...but every time this commercial aired, I wanted to shout "YES IT DOES!" after hearing them bellow, "Christmas doesn't happen without me!" 

OK, thanks for dealing with my nerdy nitpicky rage. As much as I was disturbed/annoyed by these two commericals...I kinda miss them. Holiday ads 2015: Never Forget. 

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